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~Domestic Violence, My Story~
When it all began, I met my "first love"? when I was 10, he was 17.
Nothing serious, until I became pregnant at 13. Of course I did not
tell my parents until I was 3 months so I wouldn't have to abort. It
was real hard but, I ended up moving out to be with him and start a
"HAPPY FAMILY". The first time I ever got hit was shortly after we
lived together, the reason, I did not want sex! I was kicked in the
stomach several times and finally gave in. He said his I love yous'
and I'm sorry it will never happen again. It only got worse from
there, the physical abuse continued, as well as verbal. I knew it
wasn't normal because, my parents never acted this way towards
each other. I was too ashamed and scared to tell anyone. Until one
night, my son was only a few months old and we lived with his
sister, he was sure I looked at his cousin "The wrong way". When
the beating began I balled up on the floor like usual, then his sister
heard me screaming, and came in. She had her brother leave the
room and then he called my father to come get me. What a
nightmare, I was so ashamed, then my father and him got into a
fight. From here I moved back home but, only for a short while, he
got us a place to be on our own, promised that he'd never hurt me
again. So, of course, "I Loved Him" and went back. It stopped for a
short while only to start again, soon. Now I'm pregnant again at 15,
and now at 16. The violence never stopped, only when I'd run home
to mom and he begged me to come back. It only got worse every
time, I would stand in the way of the beatings of my children. Then I
really got it! They were always little bas***ds, and anything else you
can think of.
The sherriff was called by neighbors several times but, I never did
anything, I just said we were arguing.
I worked as a waitress
while he sat at home, sometimes he worked but, not for long. Until I
got pregnant with our 4th child, at 20. I only worked up until 7
months under doctors orders. Then I was to stay home again, make
breakfast, pack a lunch and have dinner ready when he got home,
as well as a spotless house. I didn't visit my family, that wasn't
allowed. When my son was born, he had complications and I then
realized how much he did not care when I "wasn't allowed" to go to
the hospital by myself. My mother would have to drive me, well she
bought me a car during this time. This was finally my chance to get
away. He talked me into trading this car for a Trans-Am but, it was
still mine in my name. I planned and saved and the day came. I
packed 4 kids and everthing I could and left, out of state, I was so
scared that he would find me. I never told anyone where I was
going I just left when he was at work.
After a couple of days I called my mom to tell her.
Eventually he found me. I came back and "We were going to make
it work" you know, "for the kids sake"!
It didn't last long, but, this time I kicked him out!
This was it! For Good! He stalked me and everwhere I went he was
there. One day he came over after a few months "to see the kids"
and ended up beating the crap out of me, I fought back this time
and called the police. They took him to jail and gave me a
temporary restraining
order. I tried to get along with him, but it never worked. One
weekend a few years later, I went to drop the kids off for his
weekend before I went to work and he beat me again.
I now have a
permanent restraining order, for life! I never have gone back, we
haven't been toghether in 11 years!! It took a long time for me to believe that I was pretty and that I've got alot going for me. I am now married to a wonderful man who takes great care of me and my children. When we first got married I still blinked and ducked, but now I just laugh and go on with life!
The oldest is now amost 21, he remembers alot of things and hates that
about his father. I don't bring it up, only if the kids want to talk.
It was very hard to sit down and type all of this, I know I left plenty
out but, I know you don't want a book (LOL) I hope my story may
help you or someone you know.
Let's Please stop the
violence!
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